Those Lads
To the editor:
Kay S. Hymowitz’s article [“Child-Man in the Promised Land,” Winter 2008] places all the blame on the “child-men.” Women surely can’t be completely innocent. After all, the feminist movement in the sixties and seventies changed women’s expectations. Women demanded that men change to meet those new expectations, but it appears that men are still “pigs.” Only now, they don’t have any reason to “grow up” by getting married, seeing more to lose from marriage than gain. Maybe a man needs a wife like a fish needs a bicycle.
Charles Weigle
Macon, GA
To the editor:
Ms. Hymowitz is all wrong. Single young men are not avoiding marriage. They are priced out of it. Young men in the 1970s could buy their own houses. Now, even high-earning MBAs cannot afford houses, a prerequisite for marriage and family. Young men substitute video games and childish diversions because they cannot gain a woman’s intimacy that will lead to marriage.
F. Wallace
Irvine, CA
Kay Hymowitz responds:
I’ve heard from hundreds of men who agree with Mr. Weigle that the child-man is a response to feminism and who share his apparent bitterness toward both marriage and postfeminist women. As might be predicted, many women see it differently. I expect to offer a full consideration of the issue in the next City Journal. F. Wallace’s assumption that you need a house to tie the knot is a peculiar but, I suspect, common misconception. One of the goals of Western marriage has always been to build wealth, and couples commonly start out in a rental apartment. And isn’t the hope of buying a home an argument in favor of a joint bank account?
Rape Myths
To the editor:
For five years, I was a campus investigator (administrative, not law enforcement) for reports of sexual assaults by students against students. I fully agree with your conclusion that rape on campus is exceedingly rare [Heather Mac Donald, “The Campus Rape Myth,” Winter 2008]. I also agree that anyone trying to remain a neutral finder of fact can find himself vilified by those who believe that all reports of rape are true. I was accused by one complainant of dereliction of duty when I concluded that rape was not a sustainable charge when she offered her anus to a man and he ended up in her vagina instead—and she admitted that he immediately apologized. Another complainant demanded I hold a young man accountable for intended rape because he would have had sex with her had she not vomited on him, causing him to leave in disgust.
Kathy Anderson
Monterey, CA
